Well, it turns out, it really IS all about perspective.
Lately I have found myself completely overwhelmed. Things that should be enjoyable and fun have turned into huge stresses in my life. After a lot of thinking and self inspection, I realized that my problem wasn't necessarily everything that is happening all at once in my life. It is how I am choosing to look at all these things.
I found that the "stress" of moving was really outweighing my excitement about our new home. Why? Because I was focusing on how difficult everything seemed to be getting.
I realized that my fear of flying was really taking away from this trip coming up. Why? I came to the conclusion that God has a plan for my life. If it is my time, do I really think that I can avoid it? Weather it is a plane, a car, a heart attack or a giant asteroid lands on me in my sleep, if it is/was Gods will, it will happen no matter what precautionary measures I try to take. Also, How ridiculous is it that there are people I care about who are facing SERIOUS issues and I am paralyzed at the mere thought of taking a particular form of widely used transportation? How did my perspective on life get so screwed up?
When you are complete control freak like me, and life seems to be pretty perfect, you don't want to take any chances because you are afraid your life will fall apart.. No, my life isn't perfect, but looking at the BIG picture, I have so much to be thankful for. I am in a good place and I am happy. Can life really be good and last?
Well, God doesn't work like that. Life has it's ups and downs. It is pretty much guaranteed that there will be sadness and struggle. There is just no way around it. So, you have to decide how you are going to live knowing that sometimes bad things just happen for no good reason (or so it seems). It's about perspective and attitude. Do you live life in a vacuum for fear that any disruption will send your almost perfect life into a tailspin? Or, do you "Accept the things you cannot change" and actually LIVE? Tomorrow isn't guaranteed no matter how much or how little risk you take. It's important to make the most out of every day we have on this earth, because time here is short.
Ok, I'm done with this rant. It just feels so good to get that off my chest. After all this thinking, I can't tell you how much more relaxed I am and how much more at peace I am.
Thanks for letting me go on and on....
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Crazy Pregnant Hormones
Well the crazy pregnant hormones have really kicked in! Yesterday I literally cried because I had been thinking about hamburger helper (I know I know) all day. Not just any kind though. I wanted the cheese burger hamburger helper. Well, Steve came home with beef and the helper but it was the cheesy lasagna kind. I burst into uncontrollable tears! What is wrong with me?!?! Thankfully after a few minutes I was able to pull it together and move on.
CRAZY RIGHT?!?!
Ahhhhhh
I really think this is the last pregnancy for me. Crazy hormones do a number on me and I hate feeling puny. I know it will all be 100% worth it in the end, but I really think I'm going to be ok with 2 and stopping.
I can't wait for hudson to have a little brother or sister and for our family to be complete!!!!
CRAZY RIGHT?!?!
Ahhhhhh
I really think this is the last pregnancy for me. Crazy hormones do a number on me and I hate feeling puny. I know it will all be 100% worth it in the end, but I really think I'm going to be ok with 2 and stopping.
I can't wait for hudson to have a little brother or sister and for our family to be complete!!!!
Here we go again... :)
July 7, 2013
This won't be posted for a while, but I thought I would write everything down so I wouldn't forget.
Yesterday I had the sneaking suspicion that I might be pregnant... Today, it was confirmed. Well, last night I had a positive pregnancy test ( I didn't tell anyone), but the little pink line was very faint so I didn't trust what it said. hehe DENIAL
This afternoon I took 4 different tests and they all came back positive. Steve and I are beyond excited! Hudson is going to have a little sister or brother!!!
Finding out this time was nothing like finding out with Hudson. With Hudson, there were tears, fear, nerves, excitement, happiness... Just knowing that our lives would be changing forever and there was no turning back was paralyzing at times (in a good way). This time, there was calm and joy. That's it! My heart wasn't racing. I wasn't nervous or anxious. In my heart of hearts I knew before the test came back positive. I am very happy and looking forward to the newest addition making an appearance next March.
I think it's good that this time around we are more prepared and are simply happy about this news.
Steve and I are both in agreement that because the news is so "fresh" it hasn't really sunk in. It just doesn't feel real yet. I have to keep looking at the tests just to be sure we REALLY are having a baby.
I guess no I really need to find a doctor and get an appointment set up.... Good timing right?!?! I don't know what hospital to use or doctor so I think some research might be in my future.
Dear Baby 2,
We wished and prayed for you long before you were even a dream. You are loved even though we are still months away from meeting. It is so strange to have an emotional attachment to someone who at this point is a multiplying ball of cells. It is so amazing that God knows who you are though. He knows exactly who you are, what you will look like, think, feel.... In the coming months we will be preparing for your arrival. Hudson will be learning all about you and we will be helping him understand his new role as your big brother! We all love you so much and are so looking forward to spending the rest of our lives loving you.
Love,
Mom, Dad, & Hudson
Thank you God for blessing us with another baby and trusting us to raise this child to love You. We are so thankful for this gift and promise to love a
***7-25-13****
So, I'm nauseous and starving all at the same time! I really don't remember this happening so soon the first time around (5, almost 6 weeks). It is making me a little nervous that the nausea is kicking in so soon.... :( blah Also, I was really hoping to NOT gain tons of weight this time, but it is a vicious cycle. When I get hungry the nausea is BAD, so I MUST eat. O-well, Hopefully this phase will pass quickly and not be too bad.
My (our) first doctor appointment is just around the corner. Steve and I will get to see the baby and hopefully hear the heartbeat. WE ARE REALLY EXCITED! I think it will all seem much more real then.
We still haven't shared the BIG NEWS yet. It is kind of nice to just have this secret all to ourselves. Although I think some people might be getting suspicious because of my exhaustion, food cravings, and nausea.... The plan is to share with our families toward the end of August, after we have had the first ultrasound. I want to do something fun this time around, but still haven't decided exactly how we will do it.
***I have no clue what the date is... It's monday, enough said****
I'm so unbelievably hungry it isn't even funny. No chicken please, Ill eat anything else you through at me though. Today, I REALLY want some Hamburger Helper! What?!?!? Seriously, Ive been thinking about it since I woke up this morning! NOT A JOKE!
I'm also super sleepy. ugh with a one year old running around, sleep isn't easy to come by. Thankfully Hud still takes a nice long nap throughout the day. :)
This won't be posted for a while, but I thought I would write everything down so I wouldn't forget.
Yesterday I had the sneaking suspicion that I might be pregnant... Today, it was confirmed. Well, last night I had a positive pregnancy test ( I didn't tell anyone), but the little pink line was very faint so I didn't trust what it said. hehe DENIAL
This afternoon I took 4 different tests and they all came back positive. Steve and I are beyond excited! Hudson is going to have a little sister or brother!!!
Finding out this time was nothing like finding out with Hudson. With Hudson, there were tears, fear, nerves, excitement, happiness... Just knowing that our lives would be changing forever and there was no turning back was paralyzing at times (in a good way). This time, there was calm and joy. That's it! My heart wasn't racing. I wasn't nervous or anxious. In my heart of hearts I knew before the test came back positive. I am very happy and looking forward to the newest addition making an appearance next March.
I think it's good that this time around we are more prepared and are simply happy about this news.
Steve and I are both in agreement that because the news is so "fresh" it hasn't really sunk in. It just doesn't feel real yet. I have to keep looking at the tests just to be sure we REALLY are having a baby.
I guess no I really need to find a doctor and get an appointment set up.... Good timing right?!?! I don't know what hospital to use or doctor so I think some research might be in my future.
Dear Baby 2,
We wished and prayed for you long before you were even a dream. You are loved even though we are still months away from meeting. It is so strange to have an emotional attachment to someone who at this point is a multiplying ball of cells. It is so amazing that God knows who you are though. He knows exactly who you are, what you will look like, think, feel.... In the coming months we will be preparing for your arrival. Hudson will be learning all about you and we will be helping him understand his new role as your big brother! We all love you so much and are so looking forward to spending the rest of our lives loving you.
Love,
Mom, Dad, & Hudson
Thank you God for blessing us with another baby and trusting us to raise this child to love You. We are so thankful for this gift and promise to love a
***7-25-13****
So, I'm nauseous and starving all at the same time! I really don't remember this happening so soon the first time around (5, almost 6 weeks). It is making me a little nervous that the nausea is kicking in so soon.... :( blah Also, I was really hoping to NOT gain tons of weight this time, but it is a vicious cycle. When I get hungry the nausea is BAD, so I MUST eat. O-well, Hopefully this phase will pass quickly and not be too bad.
My (our) first doctor appointment is just around the corner. Steve and I will get to see the baby and hopefully hear the heartbeat. WE ARE REALLY EXCITED! I think it will all seem much more real then.
We still haven't shared the BIG NEWS yet. It is kind of nice to just have this secret all to ourselves. Although I think some people might be getting suspicious because of my exhaustion, food cravings, and nausea.... The plan is to share with our families toward the end of August, after we have had the first ultrasound. I want to do something fun this time around, but still haven't decided exactly how we will do it.
***I have no clue what the date is... It's monday, enough said****
I'm so unbelievably hungry it isn't even funny. No chicken please, Ill eat anything else you through at me though. Today, I REALLY want some Hamburger Helper! What?!?!? Seriously, Ive been thinking about it since I woke up this morning! NOT A JOKE!
I'm also super sleepy. ugh with a one year old running around, sleep isn't easy to come by. Thankfully Hud still takes a nice long nap throughout the day. :)
Monday, July 22, 2013
Sobering Reminder
After the events of the day (I will not go into) I was reminded just how precious life is. Tomorrow isn't guaranteed and we need to treasure each and every moment. We were not promised that this life would be easy and free of heartache, but through faith we were promised that this life is not the end. There is a better place that is FOREVER. I don't know about you, but when tragedies happen (and they do...often) and life doesn't make sense, I find it very comforting to know that A) God is in complete control B) He has a plan C) Death is not the end. There is everlasting, perfect, eternal life for those who know and love Him.
Praying with a heavy heart and hugging my baby a little more tonight.
Praying with a heavy heart and hugging my baby a little more tonight.
"TEVE"
The other day I was looking for Steve, so I called out "Steve, where are you?" The next sound I hear is the sweet voice of my one year old trailing behind me yelling "TEVE, Teve"! haha I couldn't stop laughing. Steve kept trying to correct Hudson, by saying "I'm daddy". But Hudson just laughed and said "teve".
O how I love my little parrot!
Hudson is at such a fun age.
I know I keep saying that, but honestly, each stage seems to be more fun than the last. I can't imagine being able to love him anymore than I already do, but just when i say that, he does or says something that turns my world upside down and I fall head over heels in love with this little stinker all over again!
I am so thankful for Hudson and my hubby who is a wonderful daddy to our son!
O how I love my little parrot!
Hudson is at such a fun age.
I know I keep saying that, but honestly, each stage seems to be more fun than the last. I can't imagine being able to love him anymore than I already do, but just when i say that, he does or says something that turns my world upside down and I fall head over heels in love with this little stinker all over again!
I am so thankful for Hudson and my hubby who is a wonderful daddy to our son!
Friday, July 19, 2013
Seasons
Hudson is at such a fun age, but it is definitely hard to get things done or go places with a walking, talking, extremely curious little boy! He needs constant supervision but wants to be independent.
This morning I went to a mommy group with a neighbor, but after about 30 minutes Hudson and I had to leave. He was into absolutely everything and wanted to push buttons and talk really loud. It was really distracting. It wasn't that Hud was being bad, he was being really good. He was just getting restless.
We are just at a phase where unless we get a sitter, we really can't go anywhere or do any grown up things.
Love him to death and wouldn't have it any other way.
:)
This morning I went to a mommy group with a neighbor, but after about 30 minutes Hudson and I had to leave. He was into absolutely everything and wanted to push buttons and talk really loud. It was really distracting. It wasn't that Hud was being bad, he was being really good. He was just getting restless.
We are just at a phase where unless we get a sitter, we really can't go anywhere or do any grown up things.
Love him to death and wouldn't have it any other way.
:)
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
I Love You
Up until recently most of Hudson's "phrases" were just him repeating what we were saying.
Tonight when I went into his room (he was supposed to be sleeping) my little love bug told me he loved me, with out being prompted!!! <3 nbsp="" p="">
I am over the moon! My heart couldn't be happier! :)
O and Hudson has started saying the alphabet (repeating after me). He's pretty good!
LOVE THIS LITTLE GUY!
Tonight when I went into his room (he was supposed to be sleeping) my little love bug told me he loved me, with out being prompted!!! <3 nbsp="" p="">
I am over the moon! My heart couldn't be happier! :)
O and Hudson has started saying the alphabet (repeating after me). He's pretty good!
LOVE THIS LITTLE GUY!
Sunday, July 7, 2013
21 months
I have successfully skipped over Mother's Day, Father's Day, my Chicago girls trip, and 4th of July, but I absolutely could NOT miss Hudson's 21 month birthday! hehe
Hudson is such a little boy now. It is unbelievable how fun he is. We can actually communicate with each other pretty well. His favorite person is still Paw Paw (my dad). He thinks Grandpa Smith is just the best thing sense sliced bread, and that's saying a lot! hehe
It is so weird to think that in just 3 months Hudson will be turning two! I love watching him grow.
Hudson has most of his teeth in and enjoys biting... o well.
Hudson can string a few words together to form thoughts/statements/sentences.
Size 5 diapers
24 month and 2T clothes
He listens pretty well and can follow directions (when he wants to).
Hudson takes 1 nap each day and still wakes up every morning around 7am.
Steve and I are 100% completely in love with this little boy. He has captured our hearts and our lives are forever changed for the better.
Hudson, we love you! xoxo
Hudson is such a little boy now. It is unbelievable how fun he is. We can actually communicate with each other pretty well. His favorite person is still Paw Paw (my dad). He thinks Grandpa Smith is just the best thing sense sliced bread, and that's saying a lot! hehe
It is so weird to think that in just 3 months Hudson will be turning two! I love watching him grow.
Hudson has most of his teeth in and enjoys biting... o well.
Hudson can string a few words together to form thoughts/statements/sentences.
Size 5 diapers
24 month and 2T clothes
He listens pretty well and can follow directions (when he wants to).
Hudson takes 1 nap each day and still wakes up every morning around 7am.
Steve and I are 100% completely in love with this little boy. He has captured our hearts and our lives are forever changed for the better.
Hudson, we love you! xoxo
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)